The week following CLTC 2 was a strange one. 

Tuesday: I said goodbye to my new best friends as we boarded our planes. The moment I sat down in my seat on the plane, it hit me: I wouldn't get a hug from my bunkmate Lily, wouldn’t be able to highfive my leadership staff, wouldn’t be able to sit in the hammock circle and talk about anything and everything with my friends. The best I could get was seeing my friends for five days at IC, and so the countdown started. 218 days until IC. I feel bad for the woman sitting next to me on the plane… I'm sure I looked crazy as I listened to a BBG separates playlist and cried over how I wouldn’t have my best friends at breakfast the next morning. Of course, coming home was nice; I told my family all about the friends I made, the things I learned, which really only made me miss CLTC more. Needless to say, the Tuesday back was a bittersweet day. 

Wednesday: My voice was still gone, lost from singing and screaming and just having a great time. I opened a google doc to write down all of my ideas to bring back to my chapter. Shabbats, enrichment ideas, new ways to incorporate the BBG folds. I began to unpack and do my laundry…which was an unexciting change in my schedule from Shira & Rikkudim or my CLN: Oneg Planning. As I went through a mountain of clothes–fresh, clean, and no longer smelling of camp–I called my new favorite groupchat. We all felt the same: we have to see each other soon. Preferably tomorrow. Can anyone teleport? How much money does everyone have for a plane ticket? 

Thursday: I showed my parents every picture on my camera roll; the cute Shabbat photos, silly photoshoots we had in the rain, on-the-go selfies that I didn’t think looking back at would make me tear up. As I flipped through each picture, pointing out who everyone was and where they lived, it dawned on me again that I wouldn’t ever have that experience again. Shortly after showing all of my photos, I texted my friends one of my favorite photos of our group, captioned with: I miss this. 

Friday: My camp voice slowly returned to normal…which was more upsetting than I thought it would be. But, at least I could talk and talk about CLTC without having to stop for water or to clear my throat. The henna that a friend tattooed on my hand was also slowly fading, becoming another memory instead of a reminder. It was the first Shabbat in two weeks where I wouldn’t be surrounded by my closest friends, wouldn’t be in services listening to other campers sing and play guitar. There wouldn’t be a friendship circle that night where we’d all get together and sing In My Life by the Beatles. 

Saturday: I met up with a friend from home, and told her all about CLTC (and subtly tried to get her to join BBYO…) and how it’s still impacting me, even days after. Obviously, she didn’t care as much as I did as I retold my days, funny lunch stories, chapter elections, seeing the stars. I think that’s how I felt before I went to CLTC myself. I heard all about how fun and exciting it was from older members in my chapter, which definitely got me more excited, but I didn’t really know what I was walking into. I can happily say that signing up for CLTC was the best way I could’ve spent 12 days of my summer. On Saturday, I finally started on my summer homework…which really just made me miss CLTC more than ever. That night, I thought about the Havdallah that my mock chapter, La’Amod BBG, put on for the last Saturday together. It was glow-in-the-dark themed, centered around the question: what or who makes you glow? An easy answer for me: each and every person I met and made a connection to at CLTC has made me glow, and I know will continue to do so, even weeks and weeks after CLTC has ended. 

Sunday: Lily and I called and planned which ILN we were interested in, and started our applications. I remember the moment we got on the bus from CLTC to the airport, we immediately decided that we’d look at the ILN together, knowing we were strengthening our connection to each other and BBYO, even miles and miles away from one another. I finally finished unpacking my bags (yes, I procrastinated because I wanted CLTC to last as long as it could), and mostly returned to the home routine. Reid, the only person I knew going in to CLTC and another person whose bond we only strengthened at camp, and I complained about how much we miss everyone, how we wish we could pack up our bags in Atlanta and move to any other state–since somehow our friends all lived so far away. 

Monday: I began to pack for a different trip. My sister and I were visiting our grandma–and again, I was so excited to tell another person about how much CLTC meant to me. I looked through the BBYO Toolbox and found the JE resources. I made some loose plans on how I could incorporate Jewish Enrichment as my home chapter’s Sh’licha. Jewish enrichment at CLTC was so special, something much more meaningful than it was at my traditional summer camp. Not only did we learn more about how pluralistic Judaism is, but we learned more internally; what Judaism really means to each individual person at CLTC. That really stuck with me throughout my Summer experience. 

Tuesday: One week since I left my home to go home. My friends and I all post on our Instagrams how much we want to go back, we reminisce with one another how we were literally bawling at the airport this time last week. I work hard on one of my ILN Applications: Summer Hype Squad. Without a doubt, I want to encourage as many BBGs and Alephs to try something new, take the leap, and go to CLTC. I still tear up when a photo of my friends pops up on my feed, still get too excited when someone from CLTC texts me. But I know that CLTC was an experience of a lifetime, not something to miss–but to build on.