Tisha Be'Av is the saddest day on the Jewish calendar. We commemorate the destruction of both the First and Second Temples in Jerusalem by observing a twenty-five-hour fast from sunset to nightfall the following day. While the holiday remembers one of the greatest tragedies in Jewish history, its message extends far beyond the past.

Jewish tradition teaches us that the Second Temple’s destruction was not only the result of Roman conquest, but was also the consequence of Sinat Chinam, or baseless hatred among the Jewish people. The Romans physically destroyed the Temple, but the sages teach us that our internal division had already brought the Temple to a spiritual breaking point. 

This lesson feels especially relevant now. Jewish communities around the world are increasingly divided, representing different denominations, political beliefs, cultures, and perspectives. We almost never agree with one another — which is natural, it’s been our tradition for generations. You know the saying: ask five different Jews a question, you get six different answers. But Ti’sha Be'Av reminds us that disagreement must never become disrespect or hatred.

For teens in our movement, this idea carries special significance. Pluralism is a core value of BBYO, and it means that every Jewish teen belongs, regardless of background or viewpoint. Building strong chapters, regions, councils, and communities means holding meaningful dialogue that encourages members to express their views. Whether it’s politics, sports, or deep conversations on religion. Learning how to disagree respectfully is one of the most important ways we ensure that our differences strengthen our community instead of dividing it. For young people, this is especially relevant. We are the most divisive we have ever been when it comes to conversations about our identity, Zionism, and what it means to be a part of the Jewish people. 

This is where teens have an opportunity to lead. Every convention, chapter program, or conversation is a chance to practice Ahavat Chinam. Instead of contempt, compassion. No person will always see eye to eye with you, but we can choose to listen before we respond and seek first to understand one another. It’s our responsibility to assume good intentions from everyone, knowing that each person is created in b’tzelem Elohim — in the image of Hashem. Further, Ahavat Chinam doesn’t even need to be a difficult conversation. It can begin with something as simple as an act of random kindness. Those small, seemingly insignificant moments are what truly build communities. 

Tisha Be'Av isn’t just about remembering what is no longer here. It’s really about choosing what comes next. If history teaches us anything, it’s that our strength has never come from uniformity, but staying united despite our differences. The choice between unity and division is one we will have to make, and a decision each generation after us will inherit. So if Sinat Chinam is what tore our nation apart, then Ahavat Chinam might be the key to bringing us back together —  building a stronger and brighter Jewish future.